Wednesday, March 28, 2012
One Plate of Spaghetti
“If two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?”
I love spaghetti, especially the way Tammy makes it. She browns about a pound and a half of beef, then adds some spaghetti sauce. She also cooks Italian sausage and adds it in with the meat sauce, and pours all that on the spaghetti noodles. I can put away half the batch by myself in one sitting. When I know we’re having spaghetti for dinner, I look forward to it all day.
I had spaghetti for dinner tonight, just the way Tammy makes it. I’m actually a pretty decent cook, so it was pretty tasty—almost as good as Tammy’s. But I didn’t really look forward to it, and I didn't really enjoy it, because I ate alone. It sucks.
I haven’t written too many selfish posts in the three-plus years we’ve had this blog. I want every prayer lifted up to be for Tammy and her recovery. But I’m asking for prayers for me, and for our kids and our extended family.
It’s hard to be alone. I have never lived alone in my life. As a life-long diabetic, it’s not a good idea. I don’t like it. Our house isn’t real big, but it’s way too big for just me. I don’t want to be here, as I’m sure you can understand. Coming home to an empty house is no fun at all. Three years ago, David Lee was here while Tammy was in the hospital, so we had each other to share frustrations, fears, jokes, good news, etc. The cats just don’t seem to understand.
I’m not asking for anything other than prayers. I have plenty of food and the ability to cook it. Please pray that I can deal with the loneliness in a productive manner. Also, please pray that I can keep up my energy as I try to keep working, keep the house clean, do the laundry and keep busy with any of the other things that make up a normal day, while still finding time to be with my favorite person in the world.
While you’re at it, please pray for our kids. They’re doing well, but I know they wish they weren’t 5,000-plus miles away. I’m thankful that they have each other (and Erich) so they can comfort each other when they’re down. And finally, please pray for our extended family. Tammy’s parents, my Mom, her brothers, my brother and all of our families are burdened with Tammy’s condition.
The opportunity to pray to the Creator of the universe is a wonderful gift. We continue to covet your prayers. Thanks for letting me act a little selfish for a little while.